Want To Overcome Your Fear of Failure? Here’s What To Do

All successful entrepreneurs, without exception, will have had failures before they found success. Their trick is having the resilience and self-belief to try again.

But for a lot of people, the thought of failing can be crippling. It stops them from going for long-held dreams or makes them think small to lessen the risk of failure. 

In this episode, I’m talking about why you need to change your view of failure and how you can flip the switch and embrace it as part of your success plan.

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Transcript

0:00

Now I hate to break this to you, but failure is something you will 100% face as an entrepreneur. It may be a big failure, or a small failure, or maybe something in between, but it will happen. And look, I'm not saying that to put you off starting a business, but to prepare you for what is really a rite of passage in the entrepreneur world. All successful entrepreneurs, without exception, will have had failures before they found success. Their trick is having the resilience and self belief to keep trying. Because to be a success, you need to try new things. And unless it's a fluke, you will not automatically be good at new things. So you need to test and try things out until you find your magic formula. But for a lot of people, the thought of failing can be crippling. It stops them from going for long held dreams. Or make some shrink them to lessen the risk of failure. So in this episode, I'm talking about why you need to change your view of failure and how you can flip the switch and embrace it as part of your success plan. Are you ready to embrace failure? Then let's dive in. Hi, I'm Nicola O'Hara, and not so long ago, I navigated my way out of a successful corporate career to launch my dream business and haven't looked back. Now, I live a life of freedom and work where, when, how, and with whom I choose. I created this podcast to teach you the strategies I learned and share the knowledge and tools I needed during my escape journey. So you can make your move out of your day job faster, smarter, and with greater ease. Think of me as your mentor, teacher, guide, and cheerleader. Through the highs and lows of the employed entrepreneur rollercoaster. If you're an aspiring entrepreneur feeling trapped, unappreciated, and unfulfilled in your job, and longing to break free to build a business and life you're passionate about, you're in the right place. This is the Powering Your Passion podcast. Hey and welcome to this episode of the Powering Your Passion podcast. This time I want to talk about failure, more specifically, fear of failure, because it's the fear of failure that comes up time and time again as a reason why people don't take action towards making their big dreams happen. If you watch Apollo 13, you'll know the quote, failure is not an option. Now in that context it really wasn't an option, as failure meant everyone in the spacecraft would die, but it is rare that failure isn't an option. In fact failure is not just an option, Often it's a necessity, and it's a secret sauce to accelerate business success. Because failure is more than just a stumbling block or the end of something. Failure is the best learning tool out there. You can read hundreds of books, take courses, and be given advice forever. But until you've actually experienced something, you can't actually know really what it's all about. For example, you can be told how to ride a bike. You can read about it. You can become an expert on technique, the different gears and balance. But until you actually get on that bike, try to ride it, and fall off a few times, you can't actually ride. Imagine what it would be like not to be scared of failure. To start every project hopeful of success, but also being prepared to fail. And to know that what you could gain from that failure could be worth more than what is lost. You will be confident to throw yourself into testing and trying things without fear. Instead of being scared to get started because you might fail. It's time to rewrite your internal dialogue, to see failure as the only way you can truly learn. In this episode I want to reshape your perspective on failure and teach you to accept it and celebrate it. So you can approach any new project confident that you will have a positive outcome, whatever the result. Now from my experience, typically I see the fear of failure manifests in three significant ways. The first is the trap of inaction. This is where the fear of failure causes people to choose to stay right where they are, deciding not to take any steps at all towards changing their lives. They think it's better to remain where they are rather than risk everything and end up in a worse situation. This inaction means they miss out on opportunities and their life stays the same. Except for that gnawing feeling of dissatisfaction, of dreams unfulfilled, and the weight of what could have been, which just grows and grows. The next is the comfort zone trap. Another result of fear of failure is playing small. Taking baby steps, never venturing too far out of what's familiar. The thought process is, I'll stick to what I know, that way the risk is minimal. But this approach means that growth is slow or sometimes non existent. They choose to start a business related to what they do in their day job because it's safer, not because of what they really want to do. They don't look outside the box at the vast, colourful world of business possibilities. So even though they've escaped the employee world, there is still a sensation of being trapped, of yearning for more, and a constant itch to stretch beyond the confining boundaries. And finally, the one timer trap. This is where they do feel the fear and do it anyway, but are not prepared for the consequences. They go all out to achieve something, but when they don't reach it, they are crushed and give up. They think, I tried once and failed. That's a clear sign this isn't for me. This can mean a pattern of starts and stops as they try different things that never lead to sustained momentum or success, and instead leads to feeling worthless, questioning their capabilities, and a growing fear of any future projects. Now if you resonate with any of these, or perhaps all of them, understand this. You are not alone. And more importantly, it's not entirely your fault. Society often paints failure with brushes of shame and embarrassment. We're conditioned to perceive failures as endpoints, not as part of the journey. Think about when you were a child. Every stumble while learning to walk, every mispronounced word when learning to speak, is met with encouragement from your parents and other grown ups. We understand that they're part of the growth process. But as we grow older, society's tolerance for getting something wrong... seems to disappear. But if every child stopped trying to walk after falling over once, or stopped learning to read at the first mispronounced word, where would humanity be? We thrive because of our innate ability to push past failures, to learn and to grow. Isn't it time to recapture that childlike spirit, that confidence that saw failures as just stepping stones to getting it right? So ask yourself this. If you could approach every venture with the resilience of a child, unafraid of failing and eager to learn, Where could you be a year from now? How much could you have learned, grown, and achieved? We often underestimate the power of our thoughts, yet they have a huge ability to shape our reality. Our internal narratives, the stories we constantly tell ourselves, act as self fulfilling prophecies. For instance, if you tell yourself you are a terrible public speaker, chances are you're gonna feel really nervous and unprepared before a presentation, ultimately leading to a performance that's less than your potential. Whereas if you believe in yourself and tell yourself that you're a great speaker, you are far more, far more likely, you are far more likely to be more confident and eloquent on the day without a fear of failure on your mind. This extends to how we think of failure. If we tell ourselves that failure is a bad thing, if things don't go completely right, it's a complete waste of time or a disaster, then we're going to dread it happening even more. And if you do fail, you'll feel all the disappointment that comes with it. Because you believe failure is a negative thing. But if you change the narrative to that, although it would be great to succeed, failure is also a win. If you fail, you are ready to use it to your advantage. So how do we go about changing this deeply ingrained narrative, especially about something as formidable as the fear of failure? Well, the first step is to become conscious of these automatic reactions. Understanding that there are shortcuts our brain has formed based on societal norms and past experiences. By acknowledging these patterns we can begin to challenge and alter them. Then you need to start telling yourself a different story. Start using positive affirmations, which can act as powerful tools to rewind and wire our brain. Phrases like, every failure is a stepping stone to success, or with every mistake I learn and grow. When repeated daily, these can start to change our intrinsic beliefs Plan for what you want to learn from a project, whether you succeed or fail. Rather than being solely results orientated, be process oriented. Get feedback, understand the intricacies, and refine your approach. This way, even if the outcome isn't favourable, the process becomes the learning experience, and you can celebrate what you've gained, whatever the outcome. You should also surround yourself with resilient role models. Whether it's through books, podcasts, or personal interactions, expose yourself to the stories of those who've faced failures and bounced back. There are many to hear about in the entrepreneur world. Failure is often behind the success of many big business owners. And then their resilience can act as a blueprint for your journey. Finally, you need to celebrate. Whether you reach the goal you wanted for a project or not, you should always celebrate that you tried, that you went for it. When setting up a business, there will be many things you will try and fail at, but make sure to celebrate it in some way. It can be something big or something small, because just by trying you have succeeded. You've done more by taking that step than any of those people who dream of being their own boss but don't quite have the courage or resilience to make it happen. Now as you work on rewriting your internal dialogue, be kind to yourself. Remember that the journey to embracing failure without fear requires patience, persistence and a lot of self compassion. You might have a few failures before you find the formula to your success, but with each step you'll be moving closer to realising your entrepreneurial dreams. No longer held back by chains of fear. The bottom line is, every step you take, even if it leads to an unexpected fall, is part of the startup process. People who hold back from their dreams due to the dread of failure, who or who are demoralized by a singular setback are the ones who never really truly taste success. Consider failure not as a barricade, but as a tutor. It educates us in ways that success just can't. It offers insights, molds resilience, and forges the path to greatness. Only by embracing and learning from failure can you genuinely refine your craft an inch closer to your aspirations. Think back to why you started this business journey. It's not just a career move, it's a quest for a transformed way of life. Each time you let the anxiety of failure shackle your steps, you drift further from that dream. Let go of those chains, take a leap, learn, and leap again. The world is waiting for what only you have to give. That's it for this time. If you enjoyed this episode then please take a moment to share it with anyone you think will benefit from it. You will find a link to share in the episode description along with a link to the show notes. And remember, you deserve to live your passion, so go for it, this is your time. Hey, so if you enjoyed this episode, make sure to follow or subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google or Amazon, so you know as soon as a new episode is released and don't miss out. And while you're there, feel free to give a rating or drop in a comment. I would love to hear from you.